Feral Cooks

Good food shouldn't be tame

Caramelized Black Pepper Chicken

By Leave a Comment

Here’s a quick and easy version of a Vietnamese dish that Food & Wine included in their September 2018 issue. The dish has a delicious combination of sweet, heat and salt from the brown sugar, Thai peppers and fish sauce, respectively. Better yet, you probably already have most of all of the ingredients already on hand.

It’s basically a stir-fry, so ensure that you have all your ingredients measured and ready to go because once you get the skillet or wok hot, you’ll have to move quickly.

This chicken goes great served over/with white or brown rice.

What you’ll need:

  • 0.5 cups brown sugar
  • 0.25 cups fish sauce (yeah, that’s a ton of sodium right there, cut back if you feel it’s too much)
  • 0.25 water (I’m not convinced this is necessary)
  • 3T rice vinegar or sushi seasoning (the stuff shown here)
  • 1t garlic, minced
  • 1t grated ginger or ginger paste
  • 1t black pepper, course ground, if possible
  • 2 Thai chilies chopped (seed them if you want to lose some of the heat)
  • 1T canola or other vegetable oil (not olive)
  • 1 large shallot, thinly sliced
  • 1 lb boneless chicken thighs cut into 1- to 2-inch pieces
  • A few cilantro sprigs, as a garnish

What to do:

Mix the sugar, fish sauce, water (if using), rice vinegar, garlic, binger, black pepper and chilies in a small bowl.

Heat the oil in your favorite fry pan or wok and consider how much of a complete a traitor you think our stooge attorney general, william barr, is. If you’re not too pissed to continue cooking, add the sliced shallot and cook until it softens, about 4-5 minutes.

Add the sugar-fish-sauce-etc. mixture and the chicken to the wok and bring to a simmer. Continue cooking for about 10 or so minutes until the chicken pieces are cooked through.

Garnish with cilantro and serve with rice.

Avocado and Miso-eggplant on Crispy Rice = Non-fish Sushi

By Leave a Comment

Here’s a cool appetizer I found in the April 2019 issue of Food & Wine. It consists of three parts: crispy rice cakes, miso eggplant and avocado. In this case, the appetizers are the eggplant and avocado on the rice cakes—kind of like a bastardized fishless sushi.

First, you need to make the crispy rice cakes, which is pretty easy. I’ll give the recipe that F&W presents, along with what I did, which seemed a lot easier and gave what I presume are the same results.

The other part you need to cook is the eggplant, which is pretty easy.

Avocado and the miso-eggplant are really just the start with these appetizers. Could put all sorts of things on them, like small, cooked shrimp, seared tuna, bacon & egg, mango & hot pepper, you name it.

There’s a lot of text below, but all this stuff is really quick and easy.

This is what my version looked like right out of the oven and already being picked at.

What you’ll need for the rice cakes—Food & Wine version:

  • 6 cups of cooked rice (2 cups uncooked)
  • 3T rice vinegar
  • 2T granulated sugar
  • 1t salt
  • 3T canola, vegetable or corn oil (I can’t help but think sesame or chili oil would work well)
  • Cooking spray

What you’ll need for the rice cakes—Feral Cooks version:

  • 6 cups of cooked rice (2 cups uncooked)
  • Premade sushi seasoning (this seasoning is made from corn syrup, vinegar, rice vinegar, salt, brown sugar and MSG—basically the ingredients in the Food & Wine version)

What you’ll need for the miso-eggplant:

  • 1 Japanese eggplant (also called nasu) diced into 0.5-inch cubes
  • 3T canola, vegetable or corn oil
  • Cooking spray
  • 0.25 cups white miso (we had only red on hand, which is much saltier—white is better for this recipe)
  • the rice-cakes you just made—18 was the magic number for the amount of eggplant in the recipe

What you’ll need for the avocado:

  • *A ripe avocado (who would have guessed?)
  • Sea salt, or some cool and crazy-expensive finishing salt
  • Cayenne pepper (optional, ‘cuz it looks cooler than boring salt)

*If you’re unsure how to safely pit and peel an avocado, watch this 37-second non-annoying video.

What to do for the rice cakes—Food & Wine version:

You know, there’s a reason I didn’t do it their way. It’s a long, overly-complicated process, so I’m not even going to bother typing it, after all. If you want to waste your time on it, go here.

What to do for the rice cakes—Feral Cook’s version:

While I’m sure the Food & Wine version would turn out perfectly, this version is much faster, and it turned out well.

Make two cups of white rice, however you make rice at home—this would yield about 6 cups of cooked rice.

Heat your oven to 450 degrees.

While the rice is still hot/warm, add 5T of premade sushi seasoning. Mix well.

Spray a rimmed baking sheet with cooking spray, and dump the rice into the middle. Flatten the rice with your hands, spreading it out across the sheet. For consistent thickness you can gently roll a greased roller of some sort over the rice. Shoot for about 0.25-inches in thickness, or a little thicker. I was making only a few rice cakes with a limited amount of rice, so I didn’t care that the perimeter of the rice sheet was thinner than the middle—this will result in charring of the “outside rice.” See photo.

Once you’re satisfied with the rice-sheet thickness, cut it into small cracker-like pieces with either a knife or pizza cutter. Spraying the cutting utensil with cooking spray will help keep the rice from sticking. You may have to spray it a couple of times.

Now the rice is ready for the oven—convection mode is best if you have it. Roast mode is good, too, if you have it, as heat from the top and bottom will brown the top of the rice, too. Cook until the rice becomes well browned and slightly crunchy.

Let the rice cakes cool before you add any toppings.

What to do for the miso-eggplant:

Heat your oven to 425 degrees, and line a baking sheet with aluminum foil that you spray with cooking spray.

Mix the diced eggplant and oil in a medium-size bowl, then spread it across the foil-lined baking sheet. Bake until tender—begin checking for done-ness at about 15 minutes.

When the eggplant is almost done cooking, make a double-boiler with a small saucepan and a heatproof bowl, with the water at a medium simmer.

Add the miso and sugar and begin heating. Cook for about 20 minutes, stirring occasionally, until the sugar melts and the miso gets hot enough to make a smooth mixture.

When the miso mixture is done, add the eggplant and gently stir. After it cools, top the rice-cakes with it.

What to do for the avocado fake-sushi:

Cut up the avocado without making a bloody mess of your hand while removing the pit. If this results in a bloody mess, blame someone else and go to the ER and get some stitches.* When you get back from the ER, layer 3-4 avocado slices on a rice cake and sprinkle a bit of sea salt on it. I actually used cayenne pepper, for a little heat.

*This did NOT happen to me, though I non-seriously cut myself on occasion.

Lasagna Rolls with Creamy Tomato Sauce

By Leave a Comment

These are kind of weird, but they taste really good and they’re pretty quick and easy to make. This concoction actually calls for two types of tomato sauce, both of which are covered in this post. The recipe for the creamy tomato sauce makes a ton of it. I think you could halve it and still have enough for this recipe. I had a ton left over, so I froze it until next needed.

Not sure what more to say about these, other than, to me, they’re better than lasagna.

There’s a lot of writing below, but don’t let it fool you. These can be prepped and assembled pretty quickly.

Ready for rolling.
Rolled and secured by toothpicks.
Sauced and ready for covering and baking.

What you’ll need for the rolls:

  • 1 lb bulk Italian sausage
  • 1 14-oz can crushed tomatoes
  • 1 6-oz can of tomato paste
  • A splash of red wine
  • Whatever Italian spices you like, fresh or dried
  • *1 package no-bake lasagna noodles
  • Shredded mozzarella or Asiago cheese

*We had some traditional-style lasagna noodles (see photos), after rolling a couple, I felt they were too narrow and frustrating to deal with.

**What you’ll need for the topping sauce:

  • 2T olive oil or butter
  • 3 or 4 cloves garlic, minced
  • 1 small onion, minced
  • 2 15-oz cans tomato sauce (unseasoned or seasoned)
  • 1 cup heavy cream
  • 0.5 cups finely shredded Parmesan (for the love of god, do not use the kind you shake out of a green cardboard can!)
  • Salt and pepper, as needed

**This is an awesome sauce that you can use for a ton of different pasta dishes—including this one. Just add meat, sautéed mushrooms and your favorite pasta.

What to do for the lasagna rolls:

Fully cook the Italian sausage in a fry pan over medium heat, breaking it up into the smallest pieces you can. When done, drain off the oil and set the sausage aside to cool.

Slowly begin bringing a large pot of salted water to a boil for the lasagna pieces.

While the meat is cooling, it’s time to make the roll sauce. Add the can of crushed tomatoes to a small fry pan over low-medium heat. With the back of the spoon, smash and crush the tomatoes like you want to do to that one jackass at work.

When the crushed tomatoes are even more crushed, add the can of tomato paste. If the sauce—it should resemble a sauce now—hasn’t begun to simmer, turn up the heat a bit until it does.

While the sauce is gently simmering, add a splash or two of red wine, and a ton of Italian spices. Let it continue to simmer until the meat has cooled and the sauce is really thick—it shouldn’t take too long to really thicken.

Remove the sauce from the heat and add the meat, mixing it in well. Let it cool while you begin making the topping sauce.

What to do for the topping sauce:

Heat the olive oil in a large skillet over medium heat. Add the minced onion and sauté until it just begins to brown. Make sure at least one of your tomato sauce cans is open.

Add the garlic and sauté it for a minute or so, then quickly add the tomato sauce so the garlic doesn’t burn. If the garlic begins to burn, just dump it out and start again with fresh oil and onion. Burnt garlic will completely ruin the dish—there’s no covering up the burnt flavor.

When both cans of tomato sauce are in the pan, add the cream, then mix well. You could add some salt and pepper at this point, too. The amount is completely discretionary; there’s no magic amount.

Let the sauce rise to a gentle simmer and hold that for a few minutes. Add the Parmesan and mix well. Set aside and let cool while you assemble the rolls.

What to do to assemble the rolls:

At this point, your salted pasta water should be boiling. Preheat your oven to 350 degrees.

Add two pieces of lasagna to the water and let them boil until they are pliable enough to roll. The amount of time will vary, depending on the brand of lasagna. While the pasta is cooking lay out a clean towel or paper towel on your workspace.

When the lasagna is pliable, gently remove it with tongs and lay it on the towel. Immediately add two more pieces of pasta to the water, then blot the top of the cooked pasta dry.

Spoon some of the sauce-meat mixture to the near end of the lasagna and top it with a big pinch of cheese (see photo). Gently roll up the lasagna, being careful that the guts don’t come out the sides. When it’s rolled, stick a toothpick in it to keep it coiled. Add to a greased baking dish.

Repeat this process until you’re out of either the sauce-meat or pasta.

Next, spoon the other tomato sauce over the rolls. Cover and bake at 350 degrees for 20 -30 minutes. By then, the cheese should be melted, the pasta cooked, and the rolls heated through. If you want a little crispiness to the pasta, cook for 10 or so minutes more, uncovered.

Serve hot.